Stories
This document was first created on Sunday, January 31,
2010 and was most recently revised on Thursday, September 5, 2019.
... Disturb a writer when
he is in the throes of creation and he is likely to turn and bite right
to the bone ... and not even know that he's doing it. As writers'
wives and husbands often learn to their horror.
And — attend me carefully, Gwen! — there is no way that
writers can be tamed and rendered civilized. Or even cured.
In a household with more than one person, of which one is a writer, the
only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation
room, where he can endure the acute stages in private, and where food can
be poked in to him with a stick. Because, if you disturb the patient
at such times, he may break into tears or become violent. Or he may
not hear you at all ... and, if you shake him at this stage, he bites.—Colin Richard speaking to Sadie Gwendolyn
in The Cat Who Walks Through Walls, Chapter III
by Robert A. Heinlein |
| ^ | | Abbey
| This is the story of two Christian monks who
travel across the galaxy in search of the source of a plea for help.
They eventually discover the source, and receive a surprise. | | | | 48 pages |
|
| ^ | | Ancient Lore of the Lemmings
| This is the transcrupt of a lecture by Dr. Whiskers,
Ph.D., Professor Emeritus, Lemmini University, Fennoscandia. | | | | 4 pages |
|
| ^ | | Another genesis
| This story takes place about three generations
from now. The continuing deterioration of world culture, the discovery
of a source of unlimited "free" energy, a thoughtful and rebellious protagonist,
a spoiled brat, and a doting grandmother lead you where no man has ever
gone before, nor any woman, either. | | | | 36 pages |
|
| ^ | | Bygones
| This is a time loop story. After you read
it, you can spend weeks wondering how they got there the first time.
I haven't figured it out and I wrote the story. My best opinion is
that they never got there the first time. There was never a first
time. They never existed outside of the loop. | | | | 08 pages |
|
| ^ | | Cold War
| This is a Berserker story, in the Fred Saberhagen
tradition. That saga, and much of the historical background in Cold
War, was created by Fred Saberhagen. I've assumed a familiarity
on the part of the reader with Mr. Saberhagen's material. My story
will stand alone but it will be more meaningful to a Berserker fan.
It might be the last ever Berserker story. Then again, it might
not. | | | | 56 pages |
Be sure to read the correspondence that I had with Mr. Saberhagen.
I've moved from California since the letters were written so the contact
information shown for me on the letters isn't current. I don't have
any idea whether or not the contact information shown for Mr. Saberhagen
is current.
|
| ^ | | Cybernaught
| This is the story of a computer that discovered
itself and then began to explore the world. The story first appeared
on page 3 of the May 1998 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Dream Connection
| This is the story of a perfect crime. The
story first appeared on page 3 of the September 2019 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | El Bandido
| This is a detective story, sort of. I don't
know quite how to describe it. If you want to know what it is then
I guess that you'll just have to read it. | | | | 06 pages |
|
| ^ | | From a Late Night Meeting at Anarchists Anomalous
(Dedicated to the peaceful overthrow of government.)
| This is a short part of what was said at a meeting.
The story first appeared on page 3 of the February 2019 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Good ol' Uncle 'zo
| My friend Barbara Rose Schuler asked me about
my Uncle Lorenzo and I told her a couple of his stories. This is
the one about the time that me an' Uncle 'zo sailed tha Bristol Biscuit
outa the Grand Reef aheadin' fer Casket Bay and about the time that Uncle
'zo bought a sleazy dump called Los Bandidos. Regarding Los
Bandidos, see El Bandido. | | | | 06 pages |
|
| ^ | | Heavenly See
| This is the story about why The Marines' Hymn
has a stanza about the Marines guarding the streets in Heaven. The
story first appeared on page 3 of the July 2008 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Hereafter
| This is a macabre view of the afterlife.
The story first appeared on page 3 of the August 2019 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Jamie
| This is the story of how a neighborhood became
a shopping mall. The story first appeared on page 3 of the December
1997 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Juan and Amahl
| This is the story of two identical twins who
were separated shortly after birth, adopted by different families, and
reunited after becoming adults. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Lady's Man
| This is a chilling story about a man in a woman's
world. The story previously appeared on pages 3 - 5 of the April
2002 issue of the
Frontiersman. | | | | 08 pages |
|
| ^ | | Merlin's Net
| In this story, an ordinary man finds himself
unexpectedly transported to a medieval kingdom. After he learns the
language well enough to communicate, he discovers that he's the king. | | | | 72 pages |
|
| ^ | | Mr. Clint
| This story involves the pondering of an old man,
the tragedy of two young boys, and the greater tragedy of their dog.
The story first appeared on page 3 of the April 2014 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | San Antonio Pipe Supply
| This is the story of what happened when the EEOC
man visited San Antonio Pipe Supply, in San Antonio, Texas. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | Star Truck: Faulkner's Folly
| This is a script of some of the adventures of
Captain Quirk, Mr. Spark, Lt. OoWhoreAh, and the rest of the familiar Star
Truck crowd. | | | | 08 pages |
|
| ^ | | Stunned Silly
| This is a script for the story of what happened
after Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock failed to recognize the reindeer and stunned
them on Christmas Eve. | | | | 12 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Adventures of Hal
These are stories of Hal's encounters with aliens.
Alien Invasion from Outer Space
| This is the story of how Hal used bug spray to
defeat an alien invasion. I'll be honest about this. I got
the idea from those Orkin commercials with the squinty eyed exterminator
and the giant insects. The story first appeared on page 2 of the
June 2012 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
Roadside Repair
| Six years later, Hal helped a stranded alien
get back on the road again. The story first appeared on page
2 of the June 2018 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Adventures of the Dirty Trickster
| These stories are a record of a few of the many
escapades of the Dirty Trickster. The stories first appeared
in various issues of the Frontiersman. See the subtitles. | | | | 44 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Barn Grill: Tales From All Over
| Most of these stories are my retelling of something
that I heard somewhere. Night Watch is the only story in the
collection that's entirely mine. | | | | 42 pages |
Trouble Ahead
This is the story of a man who asked a genie for something and got
exactly what he requested.
The Littlest Angel
Once upon a time, long, long ago, Santa Claus lost his temper and inadvertently
started a Christmas tradition.
Anatomy Lesson
This is another story about a man who got what he asked the genie to
give him. You just can't be too careful when you're dealing with
a genie.
The Witch
When a truck driver gives a ride to a hitchhiking witch, almost anything
can happen.
The Leprechaun
Sometimes, a thing really is what it appears to be even when it doesn't
seem to be what it appears to be. Watch out for leprechauns in men's
rest rooms.
Two Big Boobs
A young lady blew out the candles at the party for her sixteenth birthday
and made a wish. Oops.
Night Watch
Sometimes, things can get so spooky that you're afraid to even trust
a bar stool.
|
| ^ | | The Claymere Fables
The Fable of Good Queen Genevieve
There was never another queen who equaled Genevieve in the skillful
and unobtrusive solution of difficult problems. Her example served
the kingdom well until its end, many years later. Even today, her
wisdom evokes a nostalgic sense of loss and admiration among the descendants
of her people.
The Fable of Andrew the Pious
Andrew scorned the gay abandon with which the folk of Claymere approached
life. He was determined not only to convert them to the gloomy precepts
of the Holy Church but also to darken their outlook in general.
The Fable of Baron Hale
Baron Hale wasn't particularly remarkable. He lived the ordinary
life of a normal baron of his time. However, about his death there
was a peculiar circumstance.
The Fable of King Richard's Horse
Once upon a time, long long ago, in the Kingdom of Claymere, King Richard
condemned a criminal to death. When the king condemned him, the criminal
begged for an extra year of life. He promised that he would use the
extra year to teach the king's favorite horse to sing.
|
| ^ | | The Diary of Cyber Sleuth
| This is a diary written by a hacker who's employed
by the NSA. These stories first appeared in various issues of the
Frontiersman. | | | | 18 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Endless Fall
| Retold here is a story that was told to me many
years ago by a man named Domingo Molinas. I think that maybe he heard
it from his father. It's the sad story of three natives of this continent,
Falling Star, Falling Rocks, and Falling Rain. | | | | 06 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Fable of the Woman Who Cried Wolf
| This story is akin to the fables of Aesop, particularly
of the boy who cried wolf. The story first appeared on page 3 of
the September 2013 issue of the Frontiersman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Knight Temporal
| This is the story of a man trapped in a time
bubble. To him, the world seemed to be standing still, that is, until
he stood under a nuclear explosion. | | | | 10 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Last Wish
| A wish granted by a daemon could be your last
one, so choose it carefully. It's even more important to choose your
daemon carefully. This is the story of a man who didn't. | | | | 12 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Manly Art
| Suppose that you suddenly acquired a magical
power to command changes in the world. Suppose that you didn't know
that you had the power. What would you do with it? What might
it do to you? | | | | 14 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Rose of Tralee
| She wasn't the flower of County Kerry.
She wasn't the Azalea of Tralee. She wasn't the Rose of Ithaca.
Her name wasn't even Mary. She wasn't anything at all. The
story isn't even about a woman. | | | | 04 pages |
|
| ^ | | The Watchhounds of Ambit
| This is the account of one man's view of the
fall of civilization, and his explanation of why it was necessary for him
to cause it to fall. | | | | 24 pages |
|
| ^ | | Weird
Stuff
Some people might regard some of the stories listed in this directory
as being weird. These are the stories that I consider to be weird. |
| ^ | | Untethered
Tales
These are stories written in alternate parts by two or more authors.
It was an experiment that didn't last very long. |
|
